On Sunday (the 29th of May), I spoke at Amsterdam50's weekly worship gathering on the topic of Marriage and Sex, applying wisdom from the Proverbs of Solomon to 21st Century life. On Monday (the 30th of May), my wife and I celebrated our thirteenth wedding anniversary. Consequently, I thought it might be interesting to adapt (and improve) some of my material on "The Goodness of Marriage" for use here on my blog, in serial form. Below is my introduction to the topic:

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Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD." Or, I think it would also be safe to say that “She who finds a husband finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.” In any event, here the Bible clearly makes a case that marriage is good. But it seems to me that this notion is not as widely accepted in our culture today as it may have been, previously. Has anyone else noticed this cultural trend, too -- moving away from the institution of marriage, or at least redefining the concept of marriage?

To a certain extent, our culture has drifted towards an acceptance of sexual promiscuity and multiple partners... But actually, I think a lot of people in our culture and our generation still really value the idea of a loving, committed, monogamous relationship, but they’re just not so quick to formalize that relationship as “marriage.”

This seems to be true even among Christians here in the Netherlands. I’ve had an increasing number of conversations with people who follow Jesus but just aren’t convinced that marriage is really all that important or all that good. In essence, the argument that I’m hearing is, “What’s the big deal with marriage? Do I really need some piece of paper from the government or the blessing of some religious leader in order to stay committed to the person of my choice?!?” Does a marriage really have to start with a big white wedding ceremony in a church? Or does a marriage start at the moment when two people commit, in their hearts, that they're going to stay together forever -- and, presumably, unite themselves in the act of sex? I’ve heard some very compelling arguments in this direction -- even drawing from the Bible for their support... But even though I can totally understand where these questions are coming from, I start to worry when we stray away from this simple, basic, biblical conviction that marriage is good.

So over the next few days, I want to briefly make a case for why marriage is good, drawing support mainly from the Proverbs. You’ve probably heard some of the classic arguments for waiting to have sex until after marriage -- things like protecting yourself from unplanned pregnancies or sexually-transmitted diseases. And while there’s necessarily nothing wrong with these particular arguments, I am going to suggest three primary reasons -- both practically- and philosophically-motivated -- for promoting marriage and saving sex for within that context. And the first one, which I'll outline tomorrow, is all about integrity...