It's an old, familiar story:  Older brother teases younger sister, and younger sister screams back at older brother.  The cycle repeats itself and amplifies with each occurence -- until there's some sort of explosion.  Our household knows this story all too well.  Elliot says that Olivia's little toy puppy looks like a turtle, and Olivia says that it does not look like a turtle.  Elliot laughs and pretends that he's a little toy puppy pretending to be a turtle, poking his head out of the shirt that he's pulled up around his forehead -- "Hi, umm... Actually I, uh... I wanted to let you know that I'm not actually a little puppy... because I'm actually a little turtle" -- and Olivia says that no, her little puppy does NOT look like a turtle, not even a little bit.  Elliot laughs and continues his puppy / turtle impersonation, while adding a small turtlish dance and song -- and Olivia screams at the top of her lungs, "LITTLE PUPPY IS NOT A TURTLE!  ELL-I-OOOOOTTTT!!!" and breaks down into heaving sobs and rolling tears.  This is a way of life with young siblings.

But we try to teach them other possibilities for managing such situations.  We say, "Elliot, please do not antagonize Olivia," and "Olivia, please just use your words instead of your screaming."  We try to think through other possibilities for dealing with the problems.  If Elliot notices that his sister is becoming uncomfortable with the flow of any given conversation -- or especially if she specifically asks him to stop a given behaviori -- he is to cease and desist.  If Olivia notices that her brother is bothering her, she is to specifically ask him to stop -- and if he will not stop, in spite of her specific and direct requests, then she is to calmly come and bring the situation to Mommy or Daddy's attention.  We've tried disciplining them with time-outs and loss of privileges for negative behavior.  We've tried rewarding them with words of praise and even candy, at times, in an attempt to reinforce positive peace-making behavior.  But the cycles persist.

But one morning, not too long ago, the cycle started up again.  Specifically, I took Elliot aside and asked him why he was antagonizing his sister (not that I'd never asked such a question before nor did I hope for any particularly original answers).  It was a hopeless question, really:  "What makes you want to antagonize your sister like that?"  But for whatever reason this time Elliot paused, cocked his head to the side and considered the question seriously for the moment, and answered with a moment of remarkable clarity:

"I guess I do it because I'm bored and can't think of anything else fun to do."

The answer was so simple, straightforward, and insightful that I wanted to give him a kiss on the lips.  His honesty was so refreshing!  I couldn't keep from smiling and chuckling a little bit, out-loud.  But knowing that I also needed to be parental and opportunistic, in light of the brief epiphany, I said: "Good answer, Elliot!  I think that's very insightful.  So what do you think might be some other ideas that you could come up with, when you feel like you're bored and don't have anything else to do?"  He looked at me, blankly.  Completely clueless.  "Could you... play basketball in the basement?  Could you... read a book?"  I was trying to get his juices flowing.

"Umm... what about picking on Cor?" He smiled a mischevious grin.

It's an old, familiar story -- a way of life with young siblings.  But at least we can enjoy some rare moments of honesty and insight, for whatever they're worth.