Liar, Prude, or Accomplice

February 18th, 2009

"Hey man, do you know which way the Red Light District is?"

It's a question that I probably get asked on a weekly basis.  And it's a question that always makes me wonder how I'm supposed to respond.

I could say that I don't know... The only trick is that -- having a generally good sense of direction and six years of experience getting around in the city -- I'd be lying.

I could refuse to answer his question on ethical grounds, because I really do think that Amsterdam's sex industry is not only immoral (for the "client") but downright exploitative (for the women behind the windows, for the pimps, and for the city which allows for the practice to continue as a means of attracting tourists and increasing tax revenues).  I could offer a simple, "I'm sorry, man -- I can't tell you that" or a "Sorry, I'd rather not say."  But in a random, passing interaction like this -- with no other relational context to define the interaction -- I would only come across as a judgmental prude.

Or I could provide him with the information he's looking for -- playing the part of the friendly neighborhood tour-guide.  But because of said immorality and exploitation, I would feel like something of an accomplice to these systems -- essentially watching the poor stranger's steps leading straight to the grave.

So what am I supposed to say?  What would you say in such a situation?

This entry is filed under Amsterdam, Social Issues.

8 comments

Comment from: Anneke [Visitor] · http://annekesemiart.blogspot.com/
Well, maybe I'm too pragmatically Dutch, and think, it's going to happen anyway, illegally or legally, better to keep an eye on it. Anyway, I'd friendly point him in the right direction, and maybe add something about it being not safe? To deter him. (or because I genuinly don't know, say I don't know)
18 February 2009 @ 22:20
Comment from: Bryan Wiles [Visitor]
Prude, for sure. It may seem strange but you never know how God will use it. Maybe it will not be sceen as judgemental, but rather as one of the few people in our world who has conviction.
19 February 2009 @ 03:05
Comment from: Laurie Lynn [Visitor] · http://tulipthicket.blogspot.com/
Mike says if he was bolder he'd say, "Repent and believe the gospel", memorize Prov. 5 and begin quoting it or start singing "House of the Rising Sun". I'd pretend I don't understand his language or that I'm deaf.:) And if I was bolder, I'd spit in his eye. I am SO kidding. It is late here, way past bed time and fast becoming the "brick hour". So, what do you or should you say?
19 February 2009 @ 08:17
Comment from: Jay Asp [Visitor] · http://www.hopelesslyuncool.blogspot.com
I might just say, "I don't think you should go there, friend." From there, he could blow you off, seek out another guide, or even be caught off guard enough to ask why. Aside from sharing the physical consequences of such acts, you could lay out the way Jesus wants to see him use his body (and heart, mind and soul). Anything can happen. But at least you're not judging--you're just sharing your opinion and offering a friendly warning. And you don't have to play any of the three roles you mentioned.
19 February 2009 @ 13:20
Comment from: Matt Olszewski [Visitor]
I love this question. I may be ignorant in saying this, but as a person who has never been to Amsterdam I think that we may not be able to assume they are going for the sexual reasons we may think. Although I do admit they probably are, I think it could be possible they are seeing it as a tourist attraction. So maybe your first question could always be, "why do you want to know how to get there," or some variation of that. If they answer with the sexual reasons, then I think your brother Jay had a great response, "I don't think you should go there, friend." This may spark something. Easier said than done. Good luck.
20 February 2009 @ 20:48
Comment from: Adam Cufr [Visitor] · http://adamcufr.com
Great question. Maybe you could respond by saying "Follow me, I'll show you the way." Then proceed to dig deeper by engaging them in conversation on your journey. Maybe like the Road to Emmaus, they will get a glimpse of Jesus in your conversation. I think retail workers are instructed to walk you to the aisle you're looking for rather than simply point. Borrow a page from their playbook.
24 February 2009 @ 03:36
Comment from: Kay Rinck [Visitor]
First I'd ask them "May I ask why you want to know?" and follow their answer with, "Sounds like you need Jesus." Then you tell them how Jesus can meet their real need. These are golden opportunities to witness on the street.

A friend of mine uses this technique when she gets obscene phone calls.
28 February 2009 @ 16:27
Comment from: typo180 [Visitor] · http://typo180.com
Well, Kant would tell him the truth because lying is never ok. But Kant would tell a murder where his wife was hiding from him. That bastard.

I would just give them directions. I don't know enough about the industry in Amsterdam to condemn it and besides, the location of the red light district is common knowledge. Refusing to tell him where it is probably not going to dissuade him, but it might make you seem like kind of a jerk.

Incidentally, I've been to the red light district for non-sexual purposes. It did creep me out to see all the women on display in their windows like puppies or big-screen TVs.
02 March 2009 @ 21:58

Leave a comment


Your email address will not be revealed on this site.

Your URL will be displayed.
(Line breaks become <br />)
(Name, email & website)
(Allow users to contact you through a message form (your email will not be revealed.)