[This is part six of a series on Sexuality and Spirituality:  bypassing Christian rhetoric and examining the interaction between sexuality and spirituality with candor, honesty, and directness.  Tough questions are encouraged, controversy is invited, and the submission of differing opinions is welcomed -- so please feel free to comment as often as you'd like.]

I stated in the last post of this series that I believe some people are actually not designed to be attracted to the opposite sex.  I seriously believe this... But when it comes to endorsing homosexuality as a lifestyle... Well, here's where I start running into problems.

What about you?  Would you be scared to label homosexuality as a form of perversion in our world today?  Would this word sound too harsh?  Too abrasive?  Too judgmental?  Too moralistic?  Too Ward-Clever-black-and-white-"family-values"-anachronistic?  I mean, seriously, would you feel comfortable attaching the term "perversion" to something that so many people in the world today are embracing as a lifestyle -- as their sense of identity and purpose?  To be honest, I'm extremely indimidated to breathe the words "homosexuality" and "perversion" in the same breath -- especially given my previously stated understanding that "heterosexuality" is not for everyone.  And yet... And yet...

This phenomenon that has shaken Western culture over the last several decades -- wrapped up in pop culture contexts ranging from Elton John to Ellen to Brokeback Mountain -- represented in political debates about gay marriage and fair employment practices -- and lived out in a very personal way among our friends, neighbors, and colleagues... this "coming out" of our culture is (must I say it?) perversion personified.

Now don't you think I know how harsh this sounds?  I live in Amsterdam for goodness sake -- the capital of the "free-thinking" world, the epicenter of tolerance, the Gay Capital of Europe, the place of the pink parade prancing through the Prinsengracht every August.  And of course, more than the municipal affiliation -- there are multiple men and women whom I dearly love who will most certainly wince as they read these words.  But I don't know any other way to say it:  homosexuality is perversion.

But before you jump all over my case here, let's look for a second at the definition of perversion.  In our culture, the term has come to imply some sense of deliberate twistedness and almost a malicious disregard for morality -- but if you actually look into the word itself, it simply indicates a sense of turning (be it ever so slightly) from the proper course.  The word "perversion" basically just points to a (potentially innocent) misapplication of the truth.  And to me, I see this happening all around us -- even in my own life -- in so many different spheres of existence.  As humans, we each tend to create our own version of reality, based on our perception of the world around us.. and well, sometimes we end up with a "perversion" of reality instead of the true version of reality that corresponds with how God sees things.

So what is the true version of reality in the case of our "perversion" known as homosexuality?  I believe that the answer to this question lies in the words of Jesus himself, as recorded in Matthew, chapter 19.  In talking with a group of religious teachers about God's expectations for marriage (which turn out to be pretty high), there comes a point in the conversation where Jesus' followers basically say something to the effect of:  "Whoa -- if that's really God's standard for marriage, then maybe it's better not to get married!"  And rather than rebuking them for such a ridiculous and impractical response, Jesus says (and here I quote):  "Not everyone can accept this statement -- only those whom God helps.  Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can."

So what exactly does this mean?  Well, first it helps to understand what a eunuch is (since neither the term nor the role are very common in our culture today)... Basically, in ancient cultures of the East, eunuchs were guardians of the queen (or the princess, or potentially any female member of royalty).  They were the constant bodyguards and servants of the royal women -- day and night.  And because of this unique relationship and the absolute priority of maintaining the purity of the royal bloodline, the men who filled these roles were, um... well... removed of their ability to biologically reproduce.  Their masculine sex drive and their practical sexual functionality were taken from them so they could provide their undivided attention to the task of guarding the queen.  And while this analogy is problematic on certain levels -- as I certainly don't mean to imply that gays and lesbians are physiologically inadequate in any way -- I do wonder if Jesus' words regarding eunuchs could shed some light on the phenomenon of homosexuality in our culture today... particularly if we take the idea of "eunuchs" in the broadest sense, meaning simply as those who do not have a natural physical attraction to the opposite sex.

So could it really be that God made some people to not be attracted to the opposite sex?!?!  I think so... "Some are born as eunuchs," said Jesus.  Furthermore, the Apostle Paul spoke of a "gift of singleness" -- and while I don't want to develop too much of a theology of sexuality around a couple of isolated verses from the Bible, I think it's highly reasonable to believe that some people are born with a natural, healthy, God-given lack of desire for the opposite sex.

In addition to those being born this way, it would make sense that there are some people who "have been made eunuchs by others."  Although it's certainly a very contentious issue in popular culture today, psychological research has indicated that many people who exhibit homosexual tendencies have experienced significant trauma in childhood:  sexual abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse, neglect, the absence of a particular role model, and/or any other number of instances of pain and tragedy...  In our broken world, it only stands to reason that many men and women have had significant parts of their masculinity or feminimity crushed, maimed, bruised -- broken -- along the way.  Their aversion to the opposite sex -- or their attraction to intimate relationships with the same sex -- then, would seem to indeed be "man-made" responses to our cycles of brokenness.  Certainly, I've talked with multiple men and women who have been caught (or are currently still caught) in such cycles... and I've even observed some lives that have been "healed" over time (though almost never instantaneously).  At any rate, it seems entirely reasonable to believe that some people have developed their attitudes toward sexuality because of their past wounds inflicted by others.

So what does our culture do with those who have determined that they are not interested in the opposite sex?  It uses its idolatry of love, lust, and romance to create a perversion of reality to make sense of the facts at hand.  That is to say:  in a culture where love, sex, relationships, romance, and such are given such an abnormally high value, any person who's not attracted to the opposite sex... well, that person must be attracted to the same sex.

In our world today, we're told that our pains can be medicated by sex.  We're told that our sorrows can be drowned out by romance.  We're told that our emptiness can be filled with a relationship...  And those who don't seek out love's magic elixirs are weird.  Those who don't offer their sacrifices on Eros' altar are socially backwards. Those who don't put their faith in the god of our culture are considered heretical... And thus, a homosexual is preferable to a eunuch.  Experimental sexuality is preferable to patience and purity.  Because a life of celibacy -- in our culture -- well, that's just crazy!

But at least it's more biblical.

The truth is that the Bible -- while not explicitly stating that "homosexuality is a sin" -- leaves little ambiguity regarding God's actual attitude toward homosexuality.  In the Old Testament, homosexuality is explicitly mentioned among the other unlawful sexual relations (along with incest, adultery, and bestiality) and is specifically named as being “detestable” under the old Jewish law passed down by God.  In the New Testament, too, homosexuality is explicitly listed among a string of other "wicked" sexual practices -- and in possibly the clearest depiction of God's attitude toward homosexuality, the first chapter of Romans clearly suggests that homosexuality is "shameful," "unnatural," and -- bringing us back in a full circle -- a "perversion."

Of course, homosexuality is far from being the only way that we seek satisfaction and salvation from our brokenness!  We miss the point if we single out men and women who struggle with homosexuality -- because we could just as easily pick on men and women who "struggle with heterosexuality"... or any other number of human vices.  Vengence, achievement, religiosity, substance abuse, diet, routine, heterosexuality, homosexuality... they're all the same.  Any of us who think we're going to be able to attain our own happiness or fulfillment through something other than God are doomed to fail.  And more often than not, we'll end up destroying ourselves in the process.

I realize that coping in this world is hard.  Very hard.  And I'm not trying to be overly simplistic or dogmatic in providing pat answers to the great questions that plague us.  But I think we need to be very careful when it comes to labelling sinful coping mechanisms as good or appropriate -- in whatever form they may appear.

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In the final post of this series, I hope to address some of the "So what?" questions that come up in this analysis.  So please feel free to let me know if you have any further interaction with the thoughts that I've shared in this series -- especially in this post.  As much as I may try to make it seem otherwise at times, I don't have all the answers... But it seems to me that it's the dialogue that counts.